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October 2, 2017

Proceedings of the Natural Institute of Science | Volume 3 | SCI-NEWS 14

Scientists running out of ways to show that climate change is really happening

SILVER SPRING, MD – After thousands upon thousands of studies on climate change, scientists around the world are beginning to realize that they are quickly running out of ways to show that climate change is real and currently impacting human civilization. “It’s getting harder and harder for us to find novel climate change research topics,” said Jamie Durham, Deputy Director of the Climate Program Office at NOAA. “I mean, last week we were considering a project to determine if climate change has affected climate change, and I don’t even know what that means.”

Many experts agree that this current paucity of research studies is a result of scientists’ numerous, yet futile, attempts to convince Americans of the realities of climate change. “In a way, that’s been a good thing because it has forced us to be really thorough and complete with our research,” continued Durham. “In another, slightly different way, that’s been a bad thing because this ignorance of science is going to melt the goddamn planet.”

These frustrations have been echoed by other climate scientists. “I don’t get it. I can put out a study demonstrating that sea level rise is going to cost billions of dollars in property damage by 2100 and nobody bats an eye.” said Lucy Abrams, a climate scientist at Stanford University. “But if someone publishes a study with weak evidence suggesting that chocolate causes weight loss, suddenly everybody’s eating chocolate!”

Despite this inability to convince the public that climate change is real, many researchers remain hopeful for the future. For his part, Durham is experimenting with much more simpler studies to engage the general public. “We just published a study that shows, with incontrovertible video evidence, that a thermometer exposed to the sun will show an increase in temperature.” (FoxNews has already critiqued the study, claiming that the video was faked and that the data was manipulated).


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